The Way Out is Through…Keep Going

I’m going to share with you a few of the challenges I’ve had in the last couple of weeks because I want you to know God is FAITHFUL in the middle. No need to feel sorry for me because you and people you know are going through the same or worse situations. It’s just life.  I am not just putting quotes on my Facebook page and sharing resources with you to be cute. I want you to be encouraged and have hope! I want you to know that you know that you know: God will NEVER leave you or forsake you.

To be honest, when I am encouraging you I am encouraging myself in the Lord as well.

In the last 4 weeks….I bet you can relate:

The contract I’ve supported my family with for the last two years ended. (I have told almost no one, yet God sent people to help take care of Christmas for my kids and me.)

My daughter’s heater stopped working in her car. (When I asked how much I owed, the answer was, “It’s taken care of.” I had said nothing to anyone about needing help. I just thanked God for taking care of all of our needs.)

My son had another seizure episode which resulted in an ER visit and having to wear a heart monitor. (He got to come home and is doing well.)

My son also tripped in gym, hit a wall with his head, passed out and busted his head resulting in him having stitches. (I can barely see the scar and he had no concussion symptoms.)

The same day I had a flat tire and had to have two new tires on my car. (I made it to my son’s school and to the doctor’s office before it went flat. Someone took care of my tires and another, the front end alignment. Again, all I did was thanked God for His provision and believed He would work it out.)

My web site keeps going down just as I’m trying to really get active with my writing and get some resources to you. Ugh! (It’s fixed for now.)

I spent this whole week in bed really sick with flu-like symptoms even though I had a flu shot. There is no paid sick leave when you work for yourself so it has been extra frustrating! (God made our bodies to fight disease and win! He still hasn’t left me.)

I can choose to see the faithfulness of God or all the challenges. I choose God!

All of us are in the middle of something:  family issues, infertility, care of elderly parents, health problems, loss of loved ones, trauma, tragedy, divorce. The list could go on forever and you may have a combination of issues you deal with daily.

It’s easy to turn our anger and frustration toward God.

Why didn’t He prevent this? Why is He not getting me out of this? Why did He let me get into this?!?

In the middle of all of life’s predicaments, God sees you. If God doesn’t deliver you from your problem, He will bring you through it.  He’s in the middle of it with you, strengthening you and helping you.

One of my favorite scriptures is Psalms 46:5

“God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when the morning dawns.”

Based on personal experience and scripture, most of the time the way out is through. I believe in miracles…they just don’t usually come with a lightning bolt and an angelic visitation. Most of the miracles I have experienced have been through a process; they haven’t been a rescue from, they have been deliverance through. I would prefer the former but I usually get the latter!

The question, “Why Lord,” is useless.

“What now Lord?” is much more useful.

We may never know why, but we need to keep going regardless.

The answer to why has to do with yesterday and I need to know what to do today. Knowing why rarely changes anything.

PLEASE REMEMBER THIS:  Jesus paid a very high price for our salvation and part of what He redeemed for us is an abundant life. (John 10:10)

If I pay for something for my children I want them to have the benefit of everything I paid for, not just part. God does too.

I don’t want to just barely make it through and be miserable the entire time.  The times I have felt like I was just barely making it, my life was unbearable.

What we believe determines how we live. What we believe determines how we handle our middles, which is why FAITH is the key to an abundant life.

But what about when our faith is at an all-time low and we feel we have been deserted? I have good news! You can get your faith back, and you can grow your faith.

Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. Romans 10:17

We talk all the time; to others and ourselves. We rehearse our problems. We criticize. We complain. We worry. Why not speak the words of faith instead?

When we put the word of God into our eyes and ears and get it into our hearts, we become more aware of His presence and more familiar with His voice. We gain wisdom and we are clearer about what we are to do. We get to know Him and the way the Kingdom of God works. He reveals to us how much He loves us and we begin to really trust and hope in Him.

The bottom line: Our lives become enjoyable and we don’t feel as burdened no matter what is going on.


The word of God is a treasure and it is vital to your life for you to read, study, hear teaching and preaching, and know scripture. Jesus said,

“Man does not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.” (Matthew 4:4)

Make a decision right now to give God’s word first place in your life this year. I promise it will make all the difference!

Thank you for visiting The Land of Angela today! Do me a favor and go back to my Facebook page and share your testimony of God’s faithfulness to encourage someone else and then share this article with your friends. God may use you to change someone’s life!


Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 20 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor. He loves school and church and his friends and is not fond of summer break.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 17 year old senior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter. She’s sings in a band called Coopertheband when she’s not at school or in church.

Angela works from home as a freelance writer and blogger. She is also available to speak at your next event.

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We are given gifts according to our abilities.


I was listening to a talk in which the speaker was talking about the parable of the talents. If you aren’t familiar with the story here’s a partial summary:

The Lord of an estate gives three different people who worked for him responsibility for one, two and five talents to steward, (take care of,) while he is away. They were given different amounts according to their abilities. The moral of the story is God is pleased when we steward our gifts well and develop them to the fullest of their potential.

Many of you know that I have a son who is a special needs adult. The best way to describe his intellectual disability is a 5-8 year old mind in a fully functional man’s body. The older he gets the more frustrated he is getting and the more he is acting that out, and the more challenging parenting him has become.

Please don’t misunderstand, he is a great kid and I love him like crazy. This is just the reality of our situation right now.

The thing that hit me between the eyes is this: He is a gift that my Lord has given to me to take care of and Jesus makes the point in this parable that I was given the gift of Evan Scott according to my abilities.

Really? God are you sure because, often and especially lately, I feel very overwhelmed and inept to handle all the decisions and daily issues that come with this gift. Many days Lord I don’t feel able to take care of this gift properly. I felt more confident in my ability when he was younger although I have certainly never felt fully competent.

Even if I feel I don't have the ability, Jesus says I do.


God is not a liar so apparently I do have them. So then my mind becomes loud with questions and sounds like this:

What abilities are those exactly?

How do I find those inside of myself?

How do I not constantly feel anxious and overwhelmed with the responsibility that comes with this gift you have given me?

How do I look at even the challenging moments as part of the gift and not resent God for allowing Evan to have to deal with this?

How do I not resent God for giving me and Phoebe the ‘gift’ of dealing with all that goes with being a special needs mom and special needs sister?

I’m starting with the paradigm shift that if God says I have the ability then I do. We walk by faith and not by sight, right? I can’t see it so this seems like a good jumping off point.

I’m also trying to develop my awareness that the Holy Spirit is always present and one of the functions of the Holy Spirit is to lead us into all truth. I feel very alone on this journey so this is a process for sure.

Along with this awareness I’m trying to build the habit of having a constant dialogue with Him and asking Him for help more often. Asking for help is not my strong suit. I have found a lot of help, asked for or not, comes wrapped in strings. He is our helper.

David advises us in the Psalms to forget not His benefits. This is a benefit  I had forgot sometimes.  I am finding His help to be wrapped in only love, which is refreshing.

James encourages us to ask for wisdom if we are lacking and says the Lord will give it to us liberally and without judgement. I’m asking for it much more often these days and He is faithful; I just have to calm down and listen.

As far as the resentment goes, the Lord is making me much more aware of when resentment toward Him and others pops up. It has been a bit shocking and very uncomfortable how often I am having resentful feelings. The only thing I know to do is be honest with Jesus, and ask Him to help me. I then, on purpose, try to think on something in the “think on these things” list.

I also try to remember that I have given God and many others plenty of reasons to resent me and I appreciate the grace I have been given and want to give the same grace away.

Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. ~Philippians 4:8 ESV

I think the key is hope which is waiting in trust. I remind myself that if I just wait and trust that God has best in mind for all of us, including Evan, everything is going to be okay.

I have access to everything I need.


I’m still in THE MIDDLE of accepting I have the ability to do this or God would not have given me this gift….after nearly 21 years. I’m a slow learner.

I’m still in THE MIDDLE of figuring out how to use all of the resources Jesus’ sacrifice gave me access to.

I still make lots of mistakes but His strength is made perfect in my weakness, and for that I say to the Lord, the giver of gifts, thank you.


Thank you for visiting The Land of Angela today. I hope your were encouraged and my experiences help you somehow to navigate your own MIDDLE more easily. I believe we can use our real faith for real life. I’d love to hear your thoughts so pop over to my Facebook page  and leave a comment, or leave one below. Also if you think this could be an encouragement to your friends, I would be honored if you share on your social media pages.



Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 20 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor. He loves school and church and his friends and is not fond of summer break.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 17 year old senior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter. She’s sings in a band called Coopertheband when she’s not at school or in church.

Angela works from home as a freelance writer and blogger. She is also available to speak at your next event.




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Parenting Fail



It’s too late to convince me the Bible is not the word of God. I know all of the arguments to the contrary.

The problem is it has changed me, and continues to transform me. I’ve seen repeatedly the principles that are contained between the covers work in my life. I have gotten to know the creator of the universe as He has spoken to me through the inspired word on the pages.

I’ve also been studying neuro-plasticity where they have done studies that show when we study and pray the word of God our brain fires up at a high level and differently than when we study other things and repeat other words. But I digress…

The more I study the word of God the more fascinated I am with the Lord and His ways. The more I study the more I realize I don’t know and the more I want to study. They say the constitution is a living document but I have read it and it does not have the effect on me that the pages of scripture do.

In Jewish culture, children would be taught the scriptures at home from a young age and then from 5-10 years old, the children would go the the synagogue and be taught the memorization of the Torah. In other words they memorized the first 5 books of the old testament. From 10 to 14 they memorized Joshua through Malachi. Every word!

Deut 6:6-9 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates. KJV

The word of God is supposed to be in our heart (our mind) and we are supposed to teach it to our children. Thank goodness I don’t have to memorize the entire book of Leviticus!

I wonder though if many of us are missing the opportunity to know God and to understand His ways because we don’t learn the word ‘by heart.’ I wonder how many more of the promises of God we would see in our lives if we had more of the word memorized and really had biblical principles ingrained in our spirits.

I wonder if we are failing our children because we are not teaching them to memorize the word and talking about it at the dinner table and before bed. We aren’t teaching them to get up in the morning and take a moment to pick out a scripture that day to think about.




I am an avid student of the word probably because my gift is to teach. The way I parent my children is in large part using scriptures that are appropriate to whatever is going on. I have taught them to live according to the word and have helped them through many situations by telling them what the bible has to say about it and sharing how that wisdom has worked in my own life and the lives of others. I’ve done this because I know I am pretty much an idiot on my own!

Phoebe calls or texts me often and asks, “What’s that scripture that talks about ____?” She’s usually trying to give advice to a friend.

I have also raised them in church on purpose because I wanted them to have a good foundation to build on when they go out into the world, and I have seen what a huge difference it has made in their lives.  I have failed miserably, however, by not training them specifically to have a daily time of reading and study and prayer.

I have one and have had for years, but somehow I didn’t deliberately train my children to do the same. How in the world did I allow this to slip by? It is so important! Not because God is going to be mad at them or love them, (or me) any less. I just want them to have the tools they need to live life well.

I pray it’s not too late. I got them new bibles a few months ago and am praying to God for a strategy to make up for lost time. My daughter will be going to college in less than a year!!

The good news is God knows what they need and in my weakness He is strong. He is giving my daughter the desire in her own heart to get into the word and take some time to be alone with Him. He has also given both of them teachers in their classes at church that are focusing on developing this habit.

Phoebe and I were talking about it a few days ago and she said she thought it was better for her to decide on her own  that these things were important instead of being made to do them. I’m glad she feels that way but I’m not so sure.

Evan of course is another kind of challenge because of his significant intellectual disability. When I think about that I feel like this little child in the picture depending on my Heavenly Father to help me and having no idea where to even begin.



One reason I still believe in the church is because I know we are better together. Where I have been weak the Lord has provided others to fill in the gaps. I believe the provision we seek, and we need, is many times fulfilled in this way.

Churches aren’t perfect because there are humans in them, but God made us for community, and through His word encourages us not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together. Church attendance is not a Heaven or Hell issue but it is, in my opinion, an abundant life issue.

Abundance life- a life superior in quality.

The bible tells us we are to come together to encourage one another to love and good works. We would do well to be careful not think so highly of ourselves that we think we and our families cannot benefit from the teaching and support of others. I am so thankful for what the church has meant to me and the kids and how we have benefited from that spiritual practice.

I would love to hear how you are cultivating this habit in your children and if you are really brave an area you feel you have had a parenting fail! Run back over to facebook and leave me a comment.

Thanks for visiting the Land of Angela today!

Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 20 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor. He loves school and church and his friends and is not fond of summer break.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 17 year old senior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter. She’s sings in a band called Coopertheband when she’s not at school or in church.

Angela works from home as a freelance writer and blogger. She is also available to speak at your next event.

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I’m Retiring from Being Strong


I don’t want to be strong anymore. At least not the way strong is supposed to appear.

Strong people don’t ask for help. Strong people don’t cry. Strong people are always so positive.  Strong people have to pretend everything is okay when everything is not okay. Strong people have to be great, or fabulous, or blessed, or at the very least fine. Strong people are always there for others even when they are about to fall apart.  Strong people must keep going when they need rest. Rest is for the weak. Strong people are always very busy.

We don’t want to see strong people sweat, much less get angry or God forbid they cry in front of anyone. Strong people only cry in the shower. A total come apart… thank you. Strong people don’t get depressed or angry or exhausted.


Now we all know that’s not what strong really is but I think we also know what the approved strong behavior looks like. Many of us spend our entire lives trying to be strong. I will speak for myself and say that after about 40 years of doing what strong people are supposed to do and trying to be the way strong people are supposed to be the bottom dropped out. I just couldn’t do it anymore and I was ashamed.

If we don’t cry and but we have no joy on the inside then how strong are we really? If we are always positive but our lives are a hot mess then who cares. If everyone thinks we’re okay because I we put on a happy face but we are miserable then how does that serve us or the people around us? When we don’t rest when we are physically, mentally or emotionally exhausted then what happens when we burn out?

This is the thing. It doesn’t matter what it looks like. It matters what it is. Looking strong but having no power is useless.

After after almost two years of rest, a med change and a year or so of therapy, (I’m a slow learner) I’ve decided I want to be powerful instead of appearing strong.

I want to be powerful instead of appearing strong.

Powerful people are authentic. They cry and get mad. They face their feelings and feel their fears and deal with their issues and life’s situations. They ask for what they need.

Because they don’t pretend they are strong, they become powerful and they are able to heal and move forward. Powerful people take care of  themselves  so they have the strength to be there for others. They don’t wear themselves out trying to meet unrealistic expectations until they are no good for anyone.

Powerful people know that no is a complete sentence and yes is a gift. They have boundaries. When they say yes they don’t wrap the gift of yes in resentment  because they really wanted to say no.

They don’t complain all the time and they aren’t cynical because they believe they can do something about their situation. They have faith and hope. They believe the Lord is on their side and they believe His power is at work inside of  them.

Having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of HIS POWER toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might ~Ephesians 1:18-19 ESV

Many times when I pretend to be strong I just end up feeling taken advantage of, exhausted, lonely and empty. I definitely don’t feel powerful.

Powerlessness is one of the worst feelings in the world isn’t it? For me it feels like I have no choices and I feel backed into a corner and stuck. Let’s face it, we are powerless sometimes. There are people and things we just cannot change. That’s when we really have to call on God and use our faith to believe that He takes care of the things we cannot. It also takes faith to believe that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.

Because the Holy Spirit is a gentleman, when we are walking around pretending to be strong, His strength cannot be made perfect in our weakness. Then we  truly have no power. When we get real with ourselves and with Him, He is faithful to provide us with everything we need to live a powerful life. He’s cool like that.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. ~Philippians 4:13


It would make me so happy if you would let me know if any of this rings true for you. Are you burned out or have you learned to be powerful? Give us some tips! You can leave your comment below or you can leave it below this post on Facebook. Share it on your page if you know a friend who who needs to retire from being strong too.

Thanks for visiting the Land of Angela today. It is my honor to have you. Come back again soon!


Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 20 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor. He loves school and church and his friends and is not fond of summer break.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 17 year old senior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter. She’s sings in a band called Coopertheband when she’s not at school or in church.

Angela works from home as a freelance writer and blogger. She is also available to speak at your next event.





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When the Rooster Crows

When the Rooster Crowes

Photo credit Dollar Photo Club

“I would NEVER do that.” But then you did. Don’t worry…me too. Peter too. Paul too.

Peter denying he even knew Jesus? NEVER! Not only did he not think he would, neither did anyone else. He was always the first one to speak up, to defend the cause…even when it wasn’t the right time or if he did it the wrong way…he NEVER backed down.

Until he did. Then the rooster crowed. Just like Jesus said.

What do you do when you do what you said you NEVER do

Photo Credit Dollar Photo Club

I can easily imagine what was going on in his mind.

“I’m pathetic. I said I wouldn’t. What kind of person would do this? What kind of person am I? Why did I ever think I could make a difference? I never should have left home. What was I thinking? I always screw everything up. I am a failure. I am clearly not qualified to do this.”

Paul thought he was doing the right thing. He thought he was serving God. Even though he was going about it the wrong way. was Paul convert to Christianity? NEVER. He was arresting and killing them, accusing them of blasphemy. Not only did he think he NEVER would, neither did anyone else.

Until he did. And then he was literally blinded by the light.

“What about all those people? What have I done? How could I have been so wrong? How do I explain this? No one will believe me. I am clearly not qualified to do this.”

What do you do when you do what you said you would NEVER do?

Maybe that’s the wrong question because we know what we do. We hide. We feel ashamed. We question ourselves. We question our ability to make good decisions. We want to run away. We sometimes do what Peter did. He abandoned his calling, his purpose, and went back to his old life.

 “I’m going fishing.”

Maybe the right question is,”What does the Lord say about it?”

Go tell the disciples, and Peter, that Jesus is going ahead of you and you will see Him there….just as He told you.

Those were the angel’s instructions after Jesus had risen.  And Peter…make sure you tell Peter. I still believe in him. Make sure he knows.

Paul, Paul. Why? I am Jesus, the one you are persecuting. Now I want you to tell everyone that I am the one they have been waiting for.

That’s what Jesus told Paul on the road to Damascus.

Can you imagine? Both of them probably thought, “Who me? After what I’ve done, what I didn’t do… so many mistakes.”

But I can imagine. We can all imagine because we’ve all experienced the grace and mercy of God, against all odds. Right in the middle of our mess, our insecurities, our failures, our weaknesses.

Every time I’ve ever done what I thought I would NEVER do; what no one else thought I would ever do, every time I have come apart when I should have stayed together; every time I have been weak when I needed to be strong; every single time, God has been there calling my name.

Back to the original question. What do you do when you do what said you would NEVER do?


When the Rooster Crows

Photo credit Dollar Photo Club

The answer is He was with us before, and He was with us then, and He is still with us now that the rooster has crowed.  He’s gone ahead of us and He will never leave or forsake us. We can go to Him. He’s waiting on us, just like He said.


Thank you for visiting the Land of Angela today. Come back often and invite some friends!


Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 19 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 16 year old junior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter.

She works from home as a freelance writer, blogger, and medical biller.



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I’m very excited to welcome Shoshanna Harris to The Land of Angela today. She is an accomplished woman, a great mom, an insightful and entertaining  writer and a friend. This is brave and I appreciate her honesty because I too experience “the Cloud.” With it, the inclination to hide and isolate myself and even shame tries to sneak in. Be sure to also take a moment and visit her new blog

God Loves Me “Inside Out.”

This….is a God thing. And an emotional thing.
About two weeks ago, I took my kids to the movies. It was a kid movie. And…it was perhaps….the most profound movie I have ever seen in my life.
“Inside Out.”

I have tried to explain this thing…my thing…about this movie to everyone I come in contact with and yet…I fail to elicit the light-bulb excitements…to those I try to explain this thing to.
Light-bulb blow out.
“Inside Out,” is a movie about a young girl who experiences a traumatic life event. At pre-teen age, her parents move her out of her life, her comfort zone…to start a new life in a new state. A new school. A new everything.

Throughout the movie, we see the young girl’s emotions personified. We get to know Joy, the primary driver of her mind; Sadness, who WANTS to be the primary driver of her mind; Fear, Anger, and Disgust..who all take their turns at the control panel of her mind.

This was a ‘90-minute-AH-HAH-Moment’ for me! I was the one in the movie theater who Laughed Out Loud many times over the course of the show…causing my seven-year-old son to say, “MAMA!!! STOP!! You are too LOUD!”

Obviously…Joy had my remote control. Embarrassment had his.
I couldn’t help but to laugh at the sudden and dramatic swings in this girl’s actions and thoughts as a different emotion took the helm. She would be reminiscing one minute on family memories while Joy was at her control panel…and then sad and withdrawn as Sadness began touching her memory globes.

NOW I KNOW WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME!!!” — said My “Ah HAH” Moment!
While the girl in the movie…was primarily driven by Joy…I began to ponder on just who my own primary driver was.
Sadness got me. And Fear did too. Anger takes his turn at least once a day and then Ambivalence kinda just takes over…making sure I stay UP….no, DOWN. No,…Sideways. No, the other Sideways….An endless ride through Conflict Mountain.

The Cloud

(Photo Credit Dollar Photo Club)

I have this Cloud that follows me. Everywhere. Sometimes he makes me cry. Sometimes he makes me Scared. Sometimes he makes me Guilty. Most times..he renders me Desperate and Anxious.

It seems no matter what day it is or what is going on in my life…he is always there. Waiting to drown me. Suffocate me.
For a period of time…I fought my Cloud..with everything I had in me. Exercise. Bible Study. Holy Water. I think I tried an online Exorcism or two.

People around me said…”You are so pleasant now! Something has changed in you! You are amazing!”

But inside………all I could think about was…crawling into a dark hole and going to sleep for maybe…3 months. Just to take a break and re-start life later.
Darkness. Where everyone around you can see the flickering light. Of hope. But you can’t.
You want to….you try to….but it evades you.

One gets tired of hopelessness. Especially when there seems to be no reason for it. There is no death. No cancer. No physical abuse. No job loss. Nothing horrific that people all around have to deal with daily.

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick.” – Proverbs 13:12

A year or so ago, I undertook a Bible study written by Angela Thomas, “Brave: Honest Questions Women Ask.”
Isn’t that what all of us women need? A little more honesty with each other? More conversations based in reality…versus the Rose-Colored pictures we like to pretend we have enough pink crayons to color?

But I digress.
The study talked about Paul…and his thorn. I’m not sure I understand…or if anyone understands exactly what Paul’s thorn was….but his statements about it are poignant and relational….and always, always bring tears to my eyes when I read them.

“To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times..I pleaded with the Lord to take it from me. But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-9

Today, I boast to you. To tell you…I have a thorn. It is ugly. And I seem to never have 100% peace because of it. Yeah, I look all tidy on the outside. But I also have debilitating palpitations, chest pain, racing thoughts, and feelings of suffocation that torment me on more occasions than I care to acknowledge. And…….it is okay. My thorn is a part of my story. And your thorn is a part of yours.


(Photo Credit Dollar Photo Club)

I have learned to live with a significant humility now. A degree of discomfort…which is somewhat lessened….with a mixture of Bible study, occasional exercise…and “God-bless-it,” a prescription from my doctor. And it’s okay. God says, “It’s okay.”
God says…”I’m at the control panel again and I love you. The “Inside Out,” you. You belong to me. Now let Us pursue the abundance I have in store for you.”

I’m ShoShana. I am kind of an…..Introvert. A Loner. An Expressive, sort of..Creative, Melancholy Princess…if you will…..who also happens to be a workaholic Aries with OCD, a husband and five kids.

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It Feels Bad but It’s Really Good

It feels bad but it's really good.

Photo credit Dollar Photo Club

Today has been an emotional day for me. I’ve cried off and on all day long, mostly on.

I’ve cried because of the kindness and care of others. I’ve cried because of the faithfulness of the Lord. I’ve cried because I am in need of these kindnesses. I’ve cried because even on dreary days I’m so thankful to live with peace and beauty all around me. (The lake is very still and quiet and restful today.)

I’ve cried because this time of year stirs up some bad memories. I’ve cried because I still cry over those stupid memories. I’ve cried because I don’t know what my future holds and I’ve cried because the Lord has plans for my future.

I’ve cried because I can’t stop crying.

I’m sure every woman reading this can relate and every man reading this is thinking, “Yep. I’ve seen that happen before.” :}

Please don’t feel sorry for me though! It’s a good thing. I stuff things and stuff things until they come out all at once. They need to come out for my physical and mental health, so even though it feels bad, it’s really good.

Aren’t there so many things in our lives that feel bad for the moment, but they are really good?

One of my core values is to be who I am, no matter how other people are behaving or have behaved towards me.

I am not always successful and when, by the grace of God I am successful, it often feels bad!

It sometimes requires a throw-down with myself so that I won’t have one with someone else.

It requires me to put the filter on my mouth with the tiny holes so things I shouldn’t say can’t get through.

It might require doing the right thing even if I know the other person would not do the right thing if our roles were reversed.

When I live according to my core values, even in the middle of a difficult situation or when dealing with a difficult person, it may feel bad, but it’s really good.


It feels bad, but it's really good.

Photo Credit Dollar Photo Club

I’ve been going to therapy to work through years of stuffed down issues. My sweetheart asked me if I dread going. The answer is yes. It feels bad, but it’s really good. It is helping but I don’t enjoy the process. It’s hard and I wish I didn’t need to go there. But I do and I am.

Even exercise is hard and can feel bad in the moment, but it’s really good. (Note to self…sigh)

Think about the times when you have made a big life change. Moving, getting married, having a baby, buying a house, going to school. The process rarely ever feels good. In fact, the majority of the time the process is a real pain in the butt. We miss so much good trying to avoid the feel bad part!

I was just thinking of when I was pregnant with my sweet daughter. I puked hundreds of times. It sucked! I even told my doctor she had better be cute! I was miserable. But the result of being willing to go through the process was worth it. I am so in love with her!

Change is necessary and change is good. It is also hard and many times the middle is excruciating.  There are rewards however, in doing the hard things. (My niece says ‘however’ is a teacher word so I’m trying to sound smart now.)


  • We learn how to give grace to other people as they go through. The more hard things I deal with the more able I am to have compassion and empathy for others.
  • There is a confidence that comes when we come out on the other side and we are still standing.
  • Our faith grows and we learn how loving and trustworthy the Lord is.
  • We appreciate and don’t take for granted the life we get to live because we did the hard things.
  • We get to enjoy a life well lived.

I’m sure there are more. I’d love to hear yours!

A life lived trying to avoid difficulties is a life without much substance.

*Please don’t hear what I’m not saying. We should be wise and we should not create unnecessary difficulties by making bad decisions. I am saying that there are many times and many situations that are worth the effort. We should always pray and get the wisdom of God.

I want to be a person who is willing to go through some things for the good that is on the other side.  I want to be able to say at the end of the day and the year and even at the end of my life, that I lived well. I want to be able to say that even though it sometimes feels bad, my life is good.

I hope as I share a bit of my struggles in the middle today, you will be encouraged to change your perspective. Don’t be afraid to go through the process, because sometimes even if it feels bad, it’s really good.


Thank you for visiting the Land of Angela today. It means a lot to me that you would take the time.


Angela is a single mom raising her two favorite people.

Her favorite son Evan is a baseball and wrestling loving 19 year old young man with special needs, and a great sense of humor.

Her favorite daughter Phoebe is a 16 year old junior in high school, who is also a gifted and anointed musician, and singer/songwriter.

She works from home as a freelance writer, blogger, and medical biller.





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